It's About Time

I'm finally going home today. Mountains, old friends, family, Claire and Dave, my home church (where I dreamed last night that they told me at the last minute that I'm preaching next week), and time to devote to paper writing. Okay, the last one is a little less exciting, although I do actually like having big chunks of time to devote to writing instead of the little chunks I get at school. I have four large-ish papers to write in the next 3 weeks. I'll basically get home, sleep, eat, and start cranking them out. On the plus side, I can do most of my writing at the coffee shop near my parents house. All of you who I've been neglecting to call for the past, um, 3 months can expect phone calls too, or at least expect me to pick up when you call. And now back to packing.

That About Sums It Up

Tonight at dinner a few of us decided what would go on our class t-shirts, if we had such a thing.

PTS 2008
It Just Needs to End.

I have about 75 pages to write, 15 of them by Friday. Marcy suggests I petition to have them call it a dissertation.

My Famous Friend

Dave's Famous!

And he has a website too!

The Art of Procrastination

Due:
Tuesday - Presentation on St. Stephen of Hungary
Friday - Group presentation on our congregational study
Monday - Lit paper on Faulkner and Silko
Friday - Church History paper on the church in Hungary in 1989
and numberous other small things like a few translations, reading 4 books, a few little response papers, etc.

Done:
Swing Dance Lesson
Gingerbread Campus

Christmas Dinner/Dance (aka Seminary Prom)
Saw Enchanted
Saw The Golden Compass
Dinner out
And today a trip to the city to see the tree at Rockefeller Center, eat yummy food, shop (unsuccessfully) at H&M, and go to The Strand where I acquired 3 books on Post-Soviet era Eastern Europe.
And I won't mention how many episodes of Gilmore Girls I've watched.

Yeah, I'm ready for Christmas.

on the utility of an M.Div.

I guess there are a lot of jobs available for people with an M.Div. Cut them in half when you remove youth ministry from the picture, and then probably half that if you take out things that require you to be ordained (which I won't be for at least a few years). Also remove children's ministry, contemporary worship leader, and positions requiring experience. Factor in the statistical fact that it is more difficult for single women in their twenties to get jobs in ministry than any other demographic (I think they think there's something wrong with us, or we can't make long-term commitments or something), and the reality that I need a job that will pay enough for me to start making loan payments and most likely buy a car. That leaves me with, um . . . catering. Or maybe temp work as a receptionist.
That might be a little fatalistic, but it's also more or less true. Lucky for me, I have "administrative assistant" and "catering manager" on my resume. I'm just too damn marketable for my own good. It's a good thing I have that Biblical Languages minor, because that will really bump me up to the next salary bracket.
Unless anyone wants to support my mission work as a Spiritual Formation Coordinator at a Christian college in Lithuania (no, seriously).

Recognition

I'm torn between the desire for recognition and the desire to learn humility, and also the knowledge that in my trying not to want recognition I show false-humily and a bit of a martyr complex.
This week I've ended up being in charge of planning a lot of events of varying sizes for a student group I'm in. Some of it just went with my job description and wasn't a big deal. But the biggest event got basically dropped by the person who was supposed to be in charge of it, and I've spent the past 5 days with my life on hold trying to get everything ready for this event that takes place tomorrow night (well, tonight now since it's now Friday). And the others who dropped the event are still the people getting all the recognition for what a great thing this is and how much work they've put in and blah, blah, blah.
I really don't mind doing all this work that much. It's stuff I'm pretty good at -- the last-minute details and pulling everything together and making endless lists. But I do mind that others were supposed to be doing it, and I have yet to be asked for help or thanked for taking on this task. In fact, I've been criticized by them for the way I've chosen to do some things. So maybe it's not that I want recognition so much as I don't want others to be praised for a job they dumped on me at the last minute.
I should just be happy to help, right? It's for a good cause, and a job well done is its own reward. It doesn't matter whether others know that I made it happen in the end, and it shouldn't matter to me that others will think someone else did this great thing, but it does. So I'm fallen, and proud, and jealous, and whatever else. But I'm honest, too.
I've done everything I could to make this thing happen. And I don't want to hear it at the event when the others, who have very strong opinions about how everything should be run, criticize the set-up or the font size, or the mic placement or the fact that we have hot chocolate instead of coffee. I'm tired, I'm working catering in less than 7 hours, and I haven't read the book or write the response paper I was supposed to have done tomorrow (I mean today).
the end

how I spent my Thanksgiving break

It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Finals

. . . and yet it's not even Thanksgiving yet.
Thanks to AAR* and SBL** annual meeting, most of my professors are gone, so I only have one class this week. Which means 5ish days of (almost) uninterrupted study time. Starting next week I have one or more big papers/projects due every week until break, and then 3 major papers to write while I'm home "relaxing." So yesterday I spent about an hour planning the about-to-ensue hibernation period. I have my books and articles stacked on my floor according to which paper they go with, a new set of highlighters and page tab thingies, a tub of hot chocolate and a pound of coffee, and I'm ready to hole up in the Oratory to write and research my little heart out. First stop: The role of the church in the 1848 revolution in Hungary, immediately followed by another paper on the church in the 1989 revolution. Send me academic vibes. And peace out yo.

*American Academy of Religion
**Society of Biblical Literature

Those Pesky Adjectives

This afternoon I went to a resume writing seminar for Seniors. This was helpful since I've rarely actually needed a resume for the jobs I've had thus far. We were instructed to make a list of 10 adjective that are authentic and descriptive and use them in our resumes and cover letters. I haven't done it yet, but it sounds like a good idea. The problem: I'm sort of adjectivally boring. I don't think I'm a boring person necessarily, but intro-verted and dependable and punctual, while excellent (or at least neutral) traits to have, don't exactly screem INTERVIEW ME! Now would be a convenient time to be out-going, energetic, innovative, creative. A little help here?

Hey there, stranger!

So apparently I can't handle 16 hours of class, 20+ hours of work, the impending doom of finals and group projects AND blogging regularly.
I've started (okay, I started 3 weeks ago) mapping out the craziness that will be finals. I don't have any exams, but I have 6 large papers and 2 group project/presentations. The good news is, I'm relatively interested in all of my topics. My two papers for Church and State in Modern Europe are on the role of the Church in the revolution of 1848 (overthrowing the Habsburgs) and 1989 (end of Soviet power). Those will be fun to research, and my Hungarian friends Emoeke and Gabor can tell me how to pronounce the names. Things will start being due in two weeks and continue until Jan 16, when I leave for Edinburgh.
I'm also gearing up to start writing my application to CEU, which I can do online, and my application to the PhD program here. The latter is really just practice, since there's noone here for me to study under. I'll learn the application process and how to handle rejection, and that's not pessimism or despair, it's just the statistical reality of applying to PhD programs.
All this means I'm a senior. Have been for a few months, but it hits me. I have to buy a preaching/graduation robe. What?! I do things like look at catalogs for cassocks and collars. Wierd.
This afternoon I'm driving about 1 hour to Red Bank, NJ to visit a church that one of my group projects is about. It should be a nice change of pace, since it sounds like a vibrant and young congregation. Pray I don't get lost in Jersey. No, seriously, pray! This state is ridiculous and I don't have a map of it.

A Very Seminary Halloween

We had a costume contest at the annual Halloween dinner. The kids were cute and normal. We had a student dressed as a monk and another as Rosemary Radford Reuther (radical feminist theologian).
The Lutherans posted the 95 Theses on the chapel.
In the 20 minutes I was awake before my 8am class I remember to put on an orange sweater.
Rachel and I gave our floor girls bags of candy.
Jen and Rachel and I had dinner at Chick-Fil-A, then Jen and I watched about 2/3 of Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. Spooky!
I wish I could have gone Trick or Treating around here because these are totally the kinds of houses you expect whole candy bars from.

What I Learned While Writing a Paper on Plato

Which Jane Austen heroine are you? created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as Elinor Dashwood You're Elinor Dashwood, the "sense" of Sense & Sensibility! You tend to hide your emotions, but you feel deeply. You also feel obligated to carry the burden of keeping everyone in your family under control. Anne Elliot 85% Elinor Dashwood 85% Fanny Price 75% Catherine Morland 70% Marianne Dashwood 70% Elizabeth Bennet 55% Emma Woodhouse 50%

Brad Pitt and John Eldridge

On Saturday night Shelly and her roommate and I watched Legends of the Fall. Jacy had been inspired to watch after having read Wild at Heart by John Eldridge. I haven't read it, but apparently Eldridge references the movie as part of his argument about what a real man is. I don't know whether he was holding of the middle brother in the movie, Tristan, played by Brad Pitt, as an example of manhood to be aspired to or an example of masculinity run amock. I hope the latter, because if there is anything about that character that is supposed to be emulated by Christian men, then I have sorely misunderstood masculinity in a Christian re-framing. Granted, Tristan is dead sexy, but that's all the good that I can come up with about him. He cheats on his would-be fiance after leaving her to pursue a completely self-centered quest for psychological purging, goes on vengeful rampages, and is generally out of control. He is indeed Wild at Heart, and if that's what men are supposed to be then God save us all!
To make ourselves feel better, we watched Pride and Prejudice last night. Ah, Darcy, how we swoon for thee.
We also watched an episode of Beauty and the Beast, an old '80s TV show about "the adventures and romance between Vincent, a mythic, noble man-beast, and Catherine, a savvy assistant D.A. in New York." Everyone else seems to find the show incredibly sappy, and it is. But I still like it enough to own it on DVD.

Lazy Saturday Morning

This morning I woke to the sweet sound of the coffee grinder and the smell of banana pancakes after I solid 10 hours of sleep! Why, you may ask? Because I'm in Minneapolis visiting the fabulous Shelly. Last night we went to a concert at a little coffee shop for some awesome folk/country/bluegrass, and today we are eventually going to do something other than lounge around. Maybe ;) It's delightful to be in a different place for a few days, seeing a great friend, and writing papers. Okay the latter is less awesome. But I'm still glad to take a break.

Toddlers are Cute

Tonight I got to take care of Hannah for a few hours while her baby sister was being born. I asked her when she got her bike and she said out of the trash.
Last Sunday I "taught" pre-school Sunday School (in quotes because I haven't foggiest idea how to teach 3-5 year olds). McKenzie informed me that the animals go in the ark because they can't find the zoo.

An Option

I've been poking around here in figuring out what to do next, specifically the History department. What do you think?

My Precious

Now I know we Christians aren't supposed to place too much value on worldly possessions. But I love my new MacBook. It's so pretty :) And it renews my motivation to do homework.

Caffeine

That's what this little girl is made of!
Thanks to my coffee press and grinder and pounds of coffee, necessitated by the many hundreds of pages of reading that ushered in the new semester, I'm going on little more than adrenaline and the miracle legal stimulant. I'm off to work a reception for catering, then to translate some Hebrew and read some stuff. Tonight's goal is to get something approximating an appropriate amount of sleep. Odds? Slim.

I heart NY

I've said it before and I'll say it again. New York City is great. It's fast and loud and dingy in places; churches and monasteries are nestled into unexpected places where the City has grown up around them; people actually sit on park benches, reading or talking or just watching the world. In the movie Keeping the Faith Father Brian says of NYC, "people who live anywhere else must be kidding themselves." Granted, I don't live there, and I haven't honestly spent all that much time there, but I reserve the right to love it none the less. I would live there. Particularly Manhattan on the Lower East Side.
Free Train Week on NJ Transit has inspired this little burst of affection for the City. With just my student ID and a coupon I get to ride from Princeton to Penn Station, a mere 45-70 minutes depending on the train, absolutely free. On Thursday I went up for a few hours to go to The Strand (think Powell's in Portland, but a little smaller). It took over an hour to walk from Penn Station to 12th & Broadway, and it was great. The Strand embodies all things book lovers love about books. Huge stacks, rickety ladders to the top shelf, hand-written signs labeling the dozens of categories, grungers/nerds/hippies stocking the shelves. I got four novels for my lit class and a tote bag I've been eyeing for a few years. Come visit me and I'll take you there.
Pretty soon here I'm heading back up for the day with my friend Bill so we can catch up after long summers, and probably do some reading. (I already have 500 pages of Faulkner and 50 of Plato plus a bunch of other articles and stuff to get through.) I'm a happy girl with my coffee, my friend, and my City.

Senior Year . . . Again

Today has been my third Senior Year. Most of the world doesn't get even one Senior Year, and here I am wondering what to do with this, my third. I have not grown so attached to this place that I start the semester with a dull melancholy of the sort that settle upon me as Bianca and I rolled into Spokane in Fall 2004. My reaction is more like "What!?" I just had Senior Year two years ago, and now I have to do it all over again. The desperate meeting of course requirements, the savoring special everyday moments, and the ever present question of what I am going to do next year. The last is the main difference between this Senior Year and all the others. I knew I would go to college, I knew I would go to seminary, but now I'm more or less clueless. Options abound, limited mostly by my debt load, my determination to no longer live in a dorm, and the conviction that whatever I do next needs to be directly related to some aspect of the larger calling toward which I sense my life is headed. At this point all I can do is research, pray, and take the GREs.
I wish I could say I'm taking it easy this year, but alas there are requirements to fill and money to earn. I'm taking 16 credits and working 15-20 hours/week. My classes look good so far though, and if they live up to my expectations the year will be fruitful and not too overwhelming.
I'm taking:
Church and State in Modern Europe
Gospel and Culture: The African Experience
Old Testament Readings in Greek and Hebrew
Educating Congregations for Mission
Friendship, Love, and Justice
American Religion and American Literature
With the help of my new coffee press and variety of delightful coffees, I just might even stay awake for all those classes.